Feelings that they imagined remain exactly the same if not grow stronger, are tested by several day to day occurrences. Personal ambitions suddenly take on a great importance and partners begin to feel neglected. The good wholesome home life is taken for granted and new adventures are sought. Parenthood adds further strain to relationships and soon couples find themselves wondering whatever happened to the happy dreams and their loving partners. Common interests seem to wither and each person begins to do his or her own thing. In a scenario like this, couples can very easily drift apart and whispers of a divorce begin to abound.
If the situation has reached a boiling point where there is no love left, partners feel nothing but resentment and life together is hell, then the obvious choice becomes to go in for a divorce. However, going through a divorce is never easy. It has both emotional and financial ramifications apart from a whole legal process to contend with. It also often means that two people have to start life all over again and if children are involved then there are greater responsibilities to consider. A couple can decide to spend time apart both, to give each other space and to try to sort out issues that could help them get back together.
Distance Makes the Heart Grow Fonder
Living together, bound by the ties of matrimony can make two people begin to take each other for granted. After a few years they barely appreciate the qualities that drew them together to each other and they don't believe they need to work at their relationship anymore. When things start to go wrong, couples who are truly committed to making things work often decide to separate temporarily hoping that the physical distance will help bring the magic back. The absence of a partner's constant presence may help them realise what they are missing and understand that they too have contributed to the relationship going off track. Trial separations offer couples an opportunity to ask themselves if divorce really is the best thing for them or perhaps they should try to work harder at their marriage.
Separation Is Easier than a Divorce
The side effects of a divorce are plenty and hard to have to go through. Also, the legalities involved in getting a divorce can be a long drawn and time-consuming affair. Aspects of the marriage that couples might want to remain private are often aired under these trying circumstances. In cases where a couple wants to part only because they no longer share the same vision of life together and not because either on of them is in a hurry to re-marry, they then decide to separate and not bother with the whole process of getting divorced. Oftentimes, couples who after having been in a bad marriage do not really want to give the institution another shot albeit with another partner. Under these circumstances, if both partners are happy with the financial arrangements, they may decide to go on with their lives separately and do not feel the need at that particular point to get divorced.
Sometimes, a couple can continue being friends but just do not want a life together. They like the other being a part of their life but not necessarily as a partner, so they live separately without getting divorced until the need arises. Older couples with children, who really don't see the likelihood of re-marrying and yet cannot live together with each other anymore, decide to separate and not get divorced making it easier on the children and preventing money wars and mud slinging.
Separation Offers a Second Chance
A divorce is a final split and ver rarely is the damage undone. A divorce also requires that many related decisions that have a long-standing bearing be made. A separation on the other hand seems less final, keeps the hope alive and the bond is not completely severed. Couples invest so much of themselves in a marriage that they usually are not in a hurry to get into a similar situation again. This apart, moments shared during a marriage are precious and people learn to live with each other flaws and there is a certain comfort level. To start over can seem quite daunting and separation seems like the middle path to take. A separation doesn't completely shut the door to the past and yet offers a window to the future.
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